It’s no secret the holidays can come with a lot of stress–and the desire to change. When the clock strikes midnight on December 31st, around 37% of Americans, mostly women, demand themselves anew.1 They promise to eat healthier, exercise more, devote to new hobbies, and completely upend their lives in order to be “better versions of themselves.”
While investing in better habits is ultimately something to be celebrated, it shouldn’t be at the cost of your self worth. Deciding to become an entirely new version of yourself overnight is first and foremost unsustainable, but ultimately, detrimental to your mental health. It makes the complexities of being human lend to feeling like failure, leaving no room for grace. It can be overwhelming, which isn’t conducive to lasting change.
Many have denounced the “New Year, New Me” mindset, instead choosing to decide they’re unconditionally worthy right now while making small, self-affirming steps upwards. You are allowed, and even encouraged, to want to be your best self, but that happens in measured and intentional micro changes rather than major leaps all at once.
62% of those making resolutions feel pressured to do so.2 However, if you have an organic desire to go into the new year with some goals while still maintaining your mental and spiritual health, here’s how to sculpt achievable, meaningful resolutions you can realistically commit to without feeling pressured or guilty.
Feeling Better vs. Losing Weight
Losing weight is a common new year’s resolution. About 50% of all women in all weight classes had weight loss as a their resolution, though only 20% of reported being successful.3 This is why gym memberships skyrocket in January and then trickle off come February, as many realize they’ve bitten off more than they can chew. Rather than setting a goal weight or forcing yourself into an exercise regime too overwhelming to upkeep, try reframing your resolution. You can lean more towards committing to things that make your body feel good, like going for walks in the morning, getting eight hours of sleep, or stretching in the evening. Your physical and emotional health will still benefit without you feeling shame around not up-keeping something unrealistic.
Investing in a New Habit vs. Quitting Old Ones
Maybe you want to stop doom scrolling or late night snacking. Rather than demonize yourself when these very human habits inevitably creep back in, refocus your energy. Instead of putting yourself under the pressure of ridding yourself of something, invite in some healthy indulgences—like doing weekly sound baths, journaling, or adding some supplements to your wellness regime. These new habits will not only be exciting to integrate, but you’ll have less time to invest in the things you no longer want to feed.
Choose a Mantra vs. Writing a List
A never-ending list of new ways to be a better you is daunting. However, an affirmation to center your year on is encouraging. Choose a mantra for this next season of life, like “I say yes to playtime and adventure,” or “Rest is not a reward, it is a priority.” Make an effort to come back to this chosen mantra throughout the year, especially during trying times. It can help guide the decisions that you make and keep you rooted in your peace.
Celebrating Your Achievements vs. Setting New Ones
It’s of course wonderful to be goal oriented, but rather than adding onto your to-do list, why not take a moment to celebrate everything you've accomplished so far? Take the time to journal and reflect on all the wonderful things you’ve achieved, from work milestones to tiny wins. Building out a gratitude list for all the things that went right this year will set you on a high frequency, energetically aligning you with more of the good stuff.
Start Small vs. Doing Too Much
While getting 10,000 steps a day is all the rave, that doesn’t mean there aren’t immense benefits to starting off with 5,000 first. You can always work your way up to the fullest capacity of a commitment, while immediate big changes can be overwhelming and hard to maintain. Don’t be afraid to do the smaller versions of your goals initially, like prioritizing meatless Mondays rather than going full vegan.
Silly Resolutions vs. Serious Ones
At the end of the day, not everything needs to be so serious. We’ve conformed to deciding all energy expended needs to be productive, when in reality, we should always leave for the whimsical. Giving yourself silly resolutions that spark joy, like petting as many dogs within a week as possible, prioritizing a daily sweet treat, or always saying the nice thing you’re thinking of someone out loud, can bring some light into your daily life.
